5 Things to Help Spruce Up Your Morning Routine

morning-routine

The way you start your day from the moment you wake up sets the precedence for how the rest of your day, and ultimately how the rest of your life, will go. This is because creating a morning routine is a healthy habit that benefits both the body and mind.

Sometimes it is difficult to have a positive attitude first thing in the morning. Especially when you have a hectic day before you. It is easy to slip into a worried mindset when considering your to-do list. For this reason, I have come up with five tips to help you spruce up your morning routine and cut the negativity.

1. Eliminate Negative Thoughts

The first thing you should do in the morning is absolutely eliminate is your negative thoughts.

You should eliminate them from your life entirely, but again, it’s best to nip this in the bud at the start of your day. They’re not going to get you to where you want to go.

Instead, always look for a better feeling thought.

Become a “Vibrational Match” for the Things You Want

Everything on Earth vibrates at a specific frequency, and you must become a “vibrational match” for the things you want.

Think of yourself as a radio station. If you want to listen to jazz, you have to tune your dial to a jazz station, not a heavy metal one. Likewise, tuning your thoughts and feelings to a positive frequency will bring you positive things.

2. Don’t Think About What Could Go Wrong

Do not immediately think about what could go wrong with the things you have to do for the day.meditation-guide

Don't dread having to find a parking space or think about being late to your appointment.

Instead, I want you to close your eyes for a few moments every morning. Visualize your day going exactly the way you want it to go.

You’re going to find a parking spot. You’re going to make your appointment. Your meeting is going to go well. You are going to make that sale and you are going to finish that project.

Every single thing is going to go exactly the way you want it to.

This is what I call "intending the day."

3. Start Your Day With a Purpose

The third thing you shouldn’t do in your morning routine is start without a purpose.

What is your bigger purpose?

Know why you get out of bed in the first place.

So after visualizing your day, visualize your bigger, long-term goals coming true. And take a few moments to say your affirmations, too.

Describe Your Goals in a Completed State

Try statements that describe your goals in their already completed state. Things like, “I am celebrating feeling light and alive at my perfect body weight of 135.”

I keep each of my goals and affirmations handwritten on a 3x5 index card. I read them after I wake up in the morning and before I go to sleep at night. Doing this consistently will activate your subconscious mind’s power to fulfill the achievement of your goals.

Your subconscious will look out for anything — people, opportunities, activities, and events — that can help you achieve your goal.

4. Remember to be Grateful

Next, remember to be grateful.

It’s easy to get up, jump right into working on getting things done, and take for granted the things that brought you to this moment. Take a few minutes to write down what you’re grateful for, that’s what I do every day.

I promise you that this simple technique will work miracles in your life.

A state of appreciation and gratitude puts you in one of the highest emotional states possible.

Remember, the Law of Attraction states like energy attracts like energy.

Our thoughts are made up of energy. If you think that way, you’ll attract more abundance, which will give you more to be thankful for.

5. If You Get Inspiration, Act Immediately

The fifth and final thing you should not do in your morning routine is ignoring your inspired actions.

If you get an inspiration to do something...

Act on it immediately.

As opposed to “obvious actions,” like changing your diet if you want to lose weight, “inspired actions” are more intuitive. Like a hunch or gut feeling.

You know, those random thoughts you have? Things like “I don’t know why, but I have this urge to call my college roommate” or “I have a strong feeling that I should attend that event tonight.

You may be presented with an opportunity you would never have imagined by taking that action.

Listen to Your Gut

Most of the time you won’t see the whole plan, but if you get an inspiration, act on it!

Don’t put it off or let it go. Pick up the phone and make the call, go down to the coffee shop, or go to the event that you thought of.

I remember being at a conference in Connecticut with my wife. I felt attracted to go to a session on doubling your income. My wife questioned my decision because service, not money, had always been my primary motivator in life.

I told her I didn’t know why, but I felt compelled to go it.  When I arrived at the session, I sat down next to a woman and introduced myself. It turned out she was a veterinarian, and she had just discovered a cure for feline leukemia.

My cat had recently been diagnosed with feline leukemia. Because I had followed my inspiration to go that session, my cat went on to live many more years.

See a Positive Difference in Your Day and Your Life

I’m going to leave you with a homework assignment. Eliminate at least one of these 5 things from your morning routine and replace them with their opposite. Positive thoughts are greater than negative thoughts.

Remember to visualize your day going well instead of badly. Focus on your larger purpose and your long term goals. Take a few moments to focus on what you are grateful for.  Act on your inspirations.

If you do, I guarantee you’re going to see a dramatic, positive difference in how the rest of your day, and your life, plays out.

4 step meditation guide

 

4 Things Holding You Back From Greatness

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We all aspire to do, be, and have great things. Defining greatness is difficult because it encompasses not only how others view you, but how you view yourself.

Yet, it is easy to identify the things thwarting your self-development. Today, I want to touch on four things that might be holding you back from greatness, and how to correct them.

1. You've Surrounded Yourself With Negative People

First, you need to understand that you are strongly influenced by the people you surround yourself with and spend the most time with.

Without your being aware of it, being a member of the “Ain’t it Awful” club can hold you back from true greatness.

You know what I’m talking about!

Are there people in your life who are always complaining and blaming others for their circumstances? Who are always judging others, spreading negative gossip, and talking about how bad life is?

Do they constantly attempt to bring you back down to their level? Are they dream-stealers who try to dissuade you from believing in and pursuing your goals?

Surround Yourself With Encouraging People

Until you reach the point in your self-development where you no longer allow toxic people to hold you back with their victim mentality and their mediocre standards, you have to disconnect from their negative influences at all costs.

If you are going to be great, you have to start spending more time with great people.

I want you to make a conscious effort to surround yourself with positive, nourishing, and uplifting people. People who believe in you, encourage you to go after your dreams and applaud your victories.

2. You're Holding on to the Past Hurts

The next obstacle that can be holding you back from greatness is holding on to the past.

Most people go through life as if they are dragging a big anchor behind them that is weighing them down. They’re holding on to past hurts, past incompletes, past anger or fear.

Releasing this anchor in the present is the final step to embracing the future.

I have students who forgive people, and a few months later double their income. They also double their productivity and double their ability to accomplish important goals.

Forgiveness Puts You Back in the Present

In any relationship, you need to make the choice to come from a place of love and forgiveness.

You don’t need to condone their past actions or even ever trust them again. You do need to learn whatever lessons you can take away from the experience, forgive the other person, and move on.

When you forgive, it puts you back in the present without all the emotional baggage you’ve been carrying. You can now forge ahead and create the future you want.

3. You're Not Accepting Change

Another key concept I want you to get is that creating your future means dealing with change.

If you don’t embrace change, you’re also holding yourself back from greatness.

Let’s face it. Change is inevitable.

The Earth, the weather, the economy, technology, our leaders, even the cells in your body are constantly changing. You can either resist change and eventually get run over by it or choose to cooperate, adapt, and enjoy it.

Surrender to the Change

Think back to a time when you experienced a change and thought it was the worst thing to ever happen to you. Things like a move, a job transfer, getting fired, a divorce, or a disruptive change in technology.

What happened once you surrendered to the change?

I bet you can look back now and say, “Wow, I’m glad that actually happened. Look at the good it eventually brought me.”

Expect the Best Rather Than the Worst

Perhaps it required you to grow, to develop qualities like courage, assertiveness, creativity, asking for help or perseverance. Maybe you ended up in a better career. Or maybe you ended up in a much more positive and nurturing relationship.

Remember that you’ve been through changes before that have ultimately worked out for the best. Approach change with the excitement and positive anticipation you should.

Expecting the best rather than the worst is a mental choice that you are in charge of.

4. Your Limiting Beliefs are Destructive

Lastly, limiting your beliefs about your own capabilities or what it takes to succeed could be holding you back from greatness.

One of the most destructive beliefs you can have is that you are not capable of accomplishing your goals. You might be thinking, “I can’t do that,” “I don’t know how,” “There’s no one to show me,” “I don’t know the right people,” or “I’m not smart enough.”

Many people don’t believe that they are competent to handle life’s challenges or that they are worthy of love. These two beliefs are the two main pillars of high self-esteem.

These are just beliefs. Beliefs are just thoughts you think over and over and over. You can consciously choose to think a different thought.

Believe You are Capable of Greatness

Use the power of habit to consciously keep thinking that new thought by repeating it as an affirmation. Post it on your bathroom mirror or your refrigerator. Make it into your screen saver. All it requires is consciousness, intention and the power of repetition.

Believing that you are capable of handling anything that comes up in your life will make you fearless.

Consider this:

Haven’t you handled everything that has ever happened to you so far?

You’ve been through the death of a loved one, a divorce, being broke? Maybe the loss of a friend, your job, your money, your reputation, your youth?

These were all temporary, and no matter how painful or challenging, you survived them. You are still here, and you have the time and the resources to achieve greatness.

You Have the Ability to Create Your Life

Once you believe you deserve better and that you DO have the ability to achieve greatness, your confidence will begin to soar. You will do whatever it takes – one step at a time - to create the ideal life for yourself.

I want to leave you with a bit of homework. Identify one of your limitations, and make a change. See how much further you’ll go toward greatness.

To help hold you accountable, take a moment to comment below on what you plan on changing. I’ll make sure to follow up with you to keep you on track.

If you are looking for a roadmap to achieve any goal and create the life you want, look no further than Your Extraordinary Life Plan Program. 

This powerful, brand-new, video course is my ultimate training program in setting and achieving your biggest goals. I’ll walk you through the steps needed to create a crystal clear vision of what you want, choosing a BIG, ambitious goal, and putting together a complete plan of action and achievement. 

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Stop Using These Affirmations Now

stop-using-these-affirmations

Life is full of obstacles and roadblocks. It is easy to slip into negative self-talk when faced with these setbacks. This pessimistic outlook has a greater impact on your mindset than you’d think. I want to share a few common affirmations that you should stop using immediately and some positive replacements for them.

The Law of Attraction is at Work Right Now

The Law of Attraction is the most powerful law in the universe. Like gravity, it is always in effect, always in motion. It is working in your life at this very moment.

Simply put, the Law of Attraction says that you will attract into your life whatever you focus on. Whatever you give your energy and attention to will come back to you. If you focus on lack and negativity, then that is what you will attract into your life.

Replace These Negative Affirmations Now!

The negative messages that you feed yourself can lead to depression, lack of self-esteem and low self-confidence.

If you are using any of these affirmations you should stop, and replace them right now, instead choose from this list of positive affirmations.

1) "Money is the Root of All Evil."

The first affirmation you need to stop using now is “Money is the root of all evil” or “Having money creates more problems in life.”

There is nothing wrong with desiring financial wealth. You can do a lot of good in the world with greater financial assets. It is only the attachment to money that becomes problematic.

Replace this with:

"My life is abundant in every way."

2) "I Don't Want to Be Angry."

The second affirmation to stop using now is “I don’t want to be angry.”daily affirmations for success guide 2 offer

It’s important to focus on what you do want, not on what you don’t want. State your desires in a positive way.

Your mind works in pictures. If you say “I don’t want to be angry,” you are creating the picture and the vibration of being “angry.” The universe only receives the frequency of “angry” and responds to that.

You must focus on the opposite of what you don’t want. In this case, it would be a better choice to say

“I want to be more loving and accepting of the way things are.”

3) "I Don't Want to Get Sick."

The third affirmation to stop using now is “I don’t want to get sick.”

We have a tendency to focus on what we don’t want in so many areas of our lives, even when it comes to our own health.

When faced with an illness or disease, we become completely preoccupied with the problem rather than the desired outcome. We tend to give our complete focus to the illness, and all that it entails, instead of focusing on being healthy.

Use an affirmation like

“I always enjoy being vibrant, healthy, energetic and strong.”

Since what you focus on expands, you want to direct your energy and thoughts to those of being well. Keep your thoughts positive and optimistic, and see yourself as healthy and whole.

Your positive energy, thoughts, visualizations, affirmations, prayer and meditation combined with whatever holistic, natural integrative or traditional medical treatments you choose to seek will serve to enhance the healing process.

4) "I'm Losing Control."

The fourth affirmation to stop using is, “I am losing control.”

There are times in life where you may feel like you can’t control the things that are happening around you. Remember that you are always responsible for how you react to the things happening around you.

Negative thoughts often cause feelings of hopelessness and distance. Begin to think positively about the things happening around you and acknowledge that you are responsible.

A positive affirmations to replace this is:

“I am grateful for every experience in my life.”

Think Differently and Positively

I want to leave you with a bit of homework to complete upon reading this post.

Leave a comment below of a negative affirmation that you’ve been using and what you’re going to replace it with. I’ll be sure to follow up with you!

Make a conscious effort to restructure the way you think and speak. Avoid giving any unnecessary energy to the things you don’t want in your life. Avoid subjecting yourself, your thoughts, and your emotions to the negative people and influences in your life.

Conclusion

Now is your chance to begin thinking differently! Changing from negative to positive affirmations is the first step in the right direction.

Remember, nothing will change for the better until you do. I've created a step-by-step, daily affirmations guide to help you learn to use affirmations and recharge your inner power. Click the banner below to learn more.

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WANT TO USE THIS ARTICLE IN YOUR E-ZINE OR WEBSITE?
You can, as long as you include this complete statement with it: Jack Canfield, America's #1 Success Coach, is founder of the billion-dollar book brand Chicken Soup for the Soul® and a leading authority on Peak Performance and Life Success. If you're ready to jump-start your life, make more money, and have more fun and joy in all that you do, get FREE success tips from Jack Canfield now at: www.FreeSuccessStrategies.com

3 Reasons That Could Be Keeping You From Becoming Wealthy

becoming-wealthyMany people try to find a big break or the secret to becoming wealthy. The internet is full of “How to Get Rich Fast” articles, but your paycheck remains the same.

Sadly, there is no quick and easy route to making it big. Attaining wealth takes time, patience, and the know-how.

Here are three reasons that could be keeping you from becoming wealthy…

1. Replace Negative Beliefs About Money

Like everything I’ve said about transforming your life, financial success also starts in your mind.

So first, you’ll have a hard time becoming wealthy if you don’t surface, identify, root out, and replace any negative or limiting beliefs you have about money.

Things like:

  • "Money doesn’t grow on trees."
  • "You have to have money to make money."
  • "Money is the root of all evil."
  • "You can’t buy happiness."

Include Money In Your Daily Affirmations

These beliefs are subconsciously putting out the wrong vibrations. They conflict with your conscious intentions of becoming wealthy. Tackle these beliefs and turn them into positive turnaround statements like:

"When it comes to me, money is the root of love, joy, and good works."

And remember to include money into your daily visualizations and affirmations.

Visualize all your financial goals as already accomplished. See your desired paychecks, rent checks, bank statements, stock reports, and real estate portfolios. Feel the feelings you think you would feel when each of these becomes a reality.

Learn more about daily affirmations here.

2. Start Spending Less

The second reason becoming wealthy is hard for you is you’re not spending less.

Spending too much keeps you in debt, prevents you from saving, and focuses you on consumption.

Try this: Go through every closet, drawer, and cabinet in your house and take out everything you haven’t used in the past year.

I’ve encountered people who found expensive clothes and equipment with the tags still attached, literally used once.

Add up the cost of these items, and you’ll probably find that the total is more than your current credit card debt.

Pay Cash For Everything

To get yourself to spend less, I am going to suggest – except for things like your car or your home - paying cash for everything.

It’s immediate and it makes you think about what you’re buying. Since it’s tangible and visible, you’ll start to consider every purchase much more carefully.

Have the Lifestyle You Want For Less

Also, try living the lifestyle you want, but paying a whole lot less for it.

Try to buy things on sale. Ask for deals. Research the lowest price on the internet. Buy designer clothes at vintage shops and so on.

I know many people who do this to maintain an aggressive saving and investment program - and most success coaches will agree, too!

3. Pay Yourself First

Lastly, before you pay your debt and for the lifestyle you want, you’ll never become wealthy if you don’t pay yourself first.

There’s a book written in 1926 by money leader, George Classon called, The Richest Man in Babylon, which said the first principle of creating wealth is: “A part of all you earn must be yours to keep.”

Start by putting at least 10% of all your earnings aside. Make that money inaccessible for expenses and you’ll see this amount build over time. In turn, it will start earning money on its own.

Live on What’s Left

The world’s most aggressive savers make investing money as important as paying their debt. Get in the habit of immediately putting a predetermined percentage of your paycheck in a savings account.

This will save you some money every month. Do not allow yourself to touch it. Keep adding to that account until you’ve saved enough to move it into a mutual fund or bond account.

You can even invest it somewhere else.

Pay yourself first, then live on what’s left. Trust me, this will force you to find ways to earn more money to afford things you want to buy or do.

You can also use a vision board to stay focused on your goals and attract the resources and opportunities you need to achieve them!

Create New Money Habits

If any of the three reasons I provided resonated with you, it is clear why you are not becoming wealthy. There is no quick fix, but putting in the work and making slight adjustments to your money habits will pay off. You have the power to transform your life. It all starts in your mind.

Here is your homework: if you’re doing some of the things I’ve listed that are hindering you from creating wealth, work on creating a new money habit. Use one of my suggestions.

To help hold you more accountable, comment below on what you’re planning to do and I’ll follow up with you to keep you on track! 

If creating better money habits, achieving your goals, and becoming more successful sound appealing to you, click the button below to download my free success planner. You'll receive a daily, monthly, and yearly planner that uses my time-tested success principles as well as daily guidelines and inspirational quotes to ensure you live with passion and purpose. Don't wait a second longer to transform your destiny.

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How To Find Your Soulmate Using the Law of Attraction

how-to-find-your-soulmate-using-the-law-of-attraction

There is something to be said about the power of positive thinking. 

The basic definition of the Law of Attraction states: "What you think about, you attract." 

Positive thoughts have the power to transform our lives for the better, especially our love lives. Today I want to share a simple technique that focuses on using the Law of Attraction to find your soulmate. 

How to Find Your Soulmate By Focusing On What You Want 

In our romantic relationships, we tend to focus on the things we don’t want in a partner rather than the things we do.

Give deep thought to what you want to create in your life. Consider the relationships in your life and focus on what you do want, not what you don’t.

Get in touch with your inner truth, your authentic dreams, your goals, and your heartfelt desires. Honor these and own them without fear, shame, or inhibition.

Define Your Dreams

Your dreams and desires are not subject to anyone else’s approval.

They are yours and yours alone, but you have to define them to achieve them.

Your dreams and aspirations should serve to ignite the passion within you. This passion will not only inspire you to achieve them, but will also send a positive vibrational frequency out into the world.

Through the Law of Attraction, the universe will respond accordingly.

Learn to Activate The Law of Attraction, Achieve All of Your Goals, and Find Happiness.

Make an “Ideal Relationship” List 

One effective way to activate the Law of Attraction in your love life is to create a dream list of your ideal relationship. Your dream list will be a comprehensive overview of your dreams, goals, and desires. It will represent what you want to be, do, have, and achieve in all areas of your life including relationships. Here are the steps to make an ideal relationship list:

1. Create a T-Chart for Your Ideal Relationship

The first technique is the creation of “T-chart.” This type of chart is a very effective way to identify what you do want in your life by looking at the things you don’t want in a soulmate.

Start by drawing a line down the middle of a sheet of paper. Label the left column “What I don’t want.” and the right column “What I do want.”

For instance, within the relationship category of your life, you may want to focus on a topic such as “My Ideal Romantic Relationship.” Start by writing down what you don’t want in one column. Then in the other column, turn it around into an opposite statement, saying what it is that you do want.

2. Cross Off the "Don't Want" List  

Begin to fill out your T-chart. If you don’t want a partner who smokes, write that down on the left. Then write the opposite of that on the right side: a partner who lives a healthy lifestyle. If you want a partner who enjoys an active outdoor lifestyle, write that down on the right.

When you have completed your list, go back and cross off the “don’t want” list on the left side of your chart.

From now on, use the right side of each list and stay focused on what you do want in your life. There is no need to give any further attention or energy to the list of what you don’t want.

By the way, the simple act of crossing out what you don’t want is empowering, and it feels good!

Realize What You Want in a Soulmate

Completing this exercise will help activate the Law of Attraction in the relationship area of your life. Completing this also helps you to realize what you want in an ideal partner.

I suggest completing your own “T” chart for the relationships that you want to attract in your life.

Remember to remain focused on what kind of person you do want in your life, rather than on the person you don’t. Once you release your positive thoughts into the universe, you give it the power to transform your dream mate into a soulmate.

Conclusion

Was it easy or was it difficult to construct this dream list? Why? Let me know in the comments, and I’ll be sure to follow up with you.

Positive thoughts have a wonderful way of not only shaping our love lives but every aspect of our lives. To fully utilize the Law of Attraction in your life, you have to become a vibrational match with whatever it is you want to attract into your life. This means creating and maintaining an emotional state that matches the one you will experience when you actually get the thing you are focusing on. You can do this by appreciating what you already have, and continually finding more and more things to be grateful for.

I've written a short FREE guide to help activate the Law of Attraction in YOUR life.

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WANT TO USE THIS ARTICLE IN YOUR E-ZINE OR WEBSITE?
You can, as long as you include this complete statement with it: Jack Canfield, America's #1 Success Coach, is founder of the billion-dollar book brand Chicken Soup for the Soul® and a leading authority on Peak Performance and Life Success. If you're ready to jump-start your life, make more money, and have more fun and joy in all that you do, get FREE success tips from Jack Canfield now at: www.FreeSuccessStrategies.com

3 Keys to My Successful Marriage

jack-canfield-and-inga-keys-to-a-successful-marriage

A successful marriage is one of the most wonderful things you can share with another person.

Throughout my career, I’ve emphasized the importance of creating intimate connections with others. The same holds true with your marriage.

Because of this, I have developed 3 keys to my successful marriage that can also help YOU create more fulfilling and authentic relationships with your spouse, family members, or anyone in your life. In turn, you will see that achieving happiness in this sphere of your life will bring you success in all other areas.

The Greatest Source of Joy in My Life

My relationship with my wife, Inga, is the greatest source of joy in my life. I adore her for how much she understands me and what I am about in life:

My purpose, my mission, and my priorities.

Additionally, for her unceasing love, support, humor, and encouragement.

My 3 Keys To Maintaining a Successful Marriage

Partners often drift apart because they never develop the deep sense of connection required to overcome the stumbling blocks that happen in every relationship.

They share a bed…but not a life.

They sit next to each other… but never share their deepest thoughts and feelings with each other. Then one day they wake up to a stranger sleeping beside them.

Good relationships are key to getting what you want from life. But what most people don’t understand is creating and maintaining a successful marriage or relationship takes commitment, time and energy.

Key #1: Express Your Authentic Self

So the first key to stronger, happier, and more fulfilling relationships is committing to being and expressing your authentic self.

And that’s a lot easier said than done.

The truth is that most people put on masks and different personas depending on the people they are with and the situations they find themselves in. They become chameleons in order to be accepted, liked or loved.

Finding the Courage to Voice Your Feelings

In addition to time and energy, it takes courage and the willingness to be vulnerable – to tell the truth about your thoughts, feelings, and desires to maintain a successful marriage.

It takes courage to admit that you feel lost, scared, overwhelmed and discouraged if you are supposed to be the boss at work or the breadwinner at home.

It takes courage to admit you are unhappy or dissatisfied with the relationship, that you are not getting your needs met, or that you are thinking about quitting your job or that you find yourself being attracted to another person.

Revealing Your Flaws is Worth It

Revealing your flaws makes you more appealing to your partner and to others. And taking off all your masks to express the parts of yourself that you’d rather keep hidden is going to naturally bring up feelings of awkwardness and discomfort—even fears of rejection.

But it’ll be worth it because it’ll bring greater authenticity and awareness to your relationships.

I can remember a few years back being frustrated that my wife would often criticize my eating habits – the food I chose to eat, the amounts I was eating, and so on.

I began to feel irritated and resentful of her criticism, but in my commitment to being a positive person, I didn’t bring it up, but inside I was still feeling angry and like I wanted to get away from her when she did this.

Telling the Uncomfortable Truth

As uncomfortable as it was, I told her that I needed her to be less critical and more supportive of me whatever my behavior was, and that I would take responsibility for my body and she should take responsibility for hers.

At that point, she told me that underneath her critical comments were her fear about my health and my longevity. She didn’t want to lose me to a heart attack or an early death.

Her concerns and her fears touched me deeply. As a result, I started eating even more consciously than I had been, and she made a commitment to support me and accept me with less judgment in whatever I was doing.

The Formula For Effective Feedback

Now that I eat better she has become a lot less critical in every area of my life.  That uncomfortable conversation of truth-telling helped transform the quality of our relationship.

By the way, a powerful communication tool that we now both use, instead of criticizing the other person, is this formula for effective feedback that helps avoid defensiveness and counterattack.

It goes like this.

"When you ____, I tell myself ____, and then I feel ____, and my request is that you ____."

For example, instead of saying: "I hate it when you criticize my eating, especially in front of other people."

Say this instead: “When you eat bread and butter before dinner and then order dessert, I tell myself that you are going to have a heart attack, and then I feel scared that you are going to die and I will be left alone, and my request is that you eat fewer refined carbohydrates.”

It’s amazing how powerful this tool is for creating conversations that actually bring you closer together rather than creating separation.

Learn to Activate The Law of Attraction, Achieve All of Your Goals, and Find Happiness.

Key #2: Quality Time Forms Connections

The second key to my successful marriage is quality time.

You and your partner’s definition of quality time may be different, but you need to constantly set aside time to connect with each other in the best way that works for each of you to continually build upon your relationship.

When I spend quality time with Inga, I give her my full attention with the TV off, and my computer and phone put away. I give her full eye contact and actively listen and respond to what she is saying.

She loves going on long walks together with me or sitting by our pool and having long conversations. When we do this, she feels seen and heard and ultimately deeply connected.

Key #3: Set Goals

The third secret is to set goals.

It’s one of the most powerful of all the Success Principles, and while people use it at work and in their professional life, I notice people rarely use it in the context of achieving healthy intimate relationships.

Believe it or not, goal setting is sexy. Defining what you want and going for it with gusto is very appealing to your partner.

But remember…

It’s not enough to say that you want to spend more quality time together.

Setting Relationship Goals

As I’ve stated many times, vague goals produce vague results. If you want real results, you have to be specific and state your goal in a way that’s measurable.

You have to state how much or how many, and by when.

For example: “I will take my spouse out for dinner at least once a month and schedule one evening a week to hang out together without any TV or cell phones, so we can spend more time talking and enjoying each other’s company.”

Just like with being yourself, setting relationship goals means probably confronting some long-standing fears and roadblocks.

There is a Solution to Every Obstacle

Maybe setting the goal of spending more quality time with your spouse makes you realize that you’ll need to say “no” to your boss when he asks you to stay late or come in on the weekends.

Or maybe you’ll have to confront your fear of talking about your feelings.

It’s important to remember that there is always a solution to any obstacle — you just have to look for it. Perhaps you can ask your boss if you can come in a couple hours early on one or more of the weekdays so you can make sure you get your evenings and weekends off.

Give Each Year a Focus  

Every December, Inga and I take an afternoon or evening and set life goals for the next year.

These include how many vacation days we are going to take, how many evenings we are going to schedule with friends, how many days we are going to spend with our children and grandchildren, how many days we are going to attend a meditation or spiritual retreat, and what quality we are going to focus on for the year—

Such as love, acceptance, authenticity, fun, or courage.

One year we agreed to reread Don Miguel Ruiz’s book The Four Agreements and practice implementing one of the four agreements (be impeccable with your word, don’t take anything personally, don’t make assumptions, and always do your best),

So that by working on one each quarter, we could master them in one year.

A Successful Marriage Takes Patience

Obviously, there’s a lot more that goes into creating more successful and authentic relationships, but I want you to try one of these as your homework assignment.

Whether you’re married, in a relationship, or just want to work on your general relationships overall, I guarantee this will bring more joy into them.

The main marriage tip for you to keep in mind on this journey: Be Patient!

It may take your spouse, partner, family member or friend time to face their own fears or roadblocks before being able to meet you halfway.

If you are committed to being your authentic self, spending quality time with your partner, and setting focused goals, you’ll solve the problem together.

Conclusion

Leave a comment below with one of the relationship goals you and your partner are planning to set for 2017. I’ll follow up with you to make sure you’re staying on track! 

The Law of Attraction states that you will attract into your life--whether wanted or unwanted--whatever you give your energy, focus, and attention to. If you're feeling excited, enthusiastic, passionate, happy, joyful, loving, appreciative, abundant, prosperous, relaxed and peaceful, you will attract these same things.

Learn how to use the Law of Attraction in your life and it will change your relationships with the people you care about the most. Click the button below to learn more about harnessing the power of effortless success!

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This Holiday Season, Give Yourself the Gift of Transformation

Free Online Goal Setting Course

The holidays can be a challenging time for many people. Above and beyond the family drama, the pressure to get the perfect gifts and create the perfect celebration, and/or the loneliness that often strikes during this season, there’s also the lingering feeling that you could have done MORE this year.

You could have worked harder, saved more money, completed more projects, crossed more items off your to-do list, spent more time on your relationships, etc. etc.

Sound familiar?

If you’re wrestling with any of these feelings – or if you would simply love to hit the ground running in January and set yourself up for greater success in 2016 – I invite you to give yourself a powerful gift this month by taking part in my free 10-Day Transformation series.

Over the course of 10 days, you’ll receive daily lessons that will help you overcome the obstacles that have been holding you back from achieving your biggest goals and enjoying deeper, more fulfilling relationships with the important people in your life.

You’ll learn how to regain 100% control over your life... heal old wounds... gain clarity on what your true purpose is... and clear your path of the roadblocks that have been preventing you from creating an ideal life filled with joy, meaning, and passion.

This is the most popular free training I have offered.

More than 85,000 people have already gone through this 10-day series and experienced incredible results.

Now it’s your turn. Here’s your chance to let go of old habits and ideas that no longer serve you. Not only will the lessons you learn help you get more meaning and joy from the holidays, they will also help ensure that 2016 is your best year yet!

Click here to learn more and sign up. I look forward to seeing you participate in the series!  


How to Use a Vision Board to Make Your Ideal Life a Reality

Vision Board

The best way to achieve your goals is to keep them top of mind, so you’re always looking for ways to move yourself closer to them – and a vision board is the perfect tool to help you do that.

By putting a vision board somewhere you can see it every day, you will prompt yourself to visualize your ideal life on a regular basis. And that’s important because visualization activates the creative powers of your subconscious mind and programs your brain to notice available resources that were always there but escaped your notice. Through the Law of Attraction, visualization also magnetizes and attracts to you the people, resources, and opportunities you need to achieve your goal.

By adding a visualization practice to your daily routine, you will naturally become more motivated to reach your goals. You’ll start to notice you are unexpectedly doing things that move you closer to your ideal life. Suddenly, you find yourself volunteering to take on more responsibility at work, speaking out at staff meetings, asking more directly for what you want, and taking more risks in your personal and professional life – and experiencing bigger pay-offs. 

It’s pretty cool stuff!

So, how do you create a vision board to help you with your visualization practice?

Here’s my simple 6-step process:

1) Create a list of goals you’d like to achieve in the next year

In order to visualize your goals, first you need to know what they are. Spend some time getting clear on exactly what you want your ideal life to look like, and what you need to accomplish in the next 12 months to launch you closer to your goals.

Chapter 2: “Be Clear Why You’re Here,” and Chapter 3: “Decide What You Want,” in my best-selling book, The Success Principles, can help you with this process.

2) Collect a bundle of old magazines with beautiful pictures

If you’re not a magazine reader or currently don’t have any magazines at home, ask your friends to give you any they no longer want. You should also be able to pick some up for just a dollar or two per magazine at your local thrift store. Or you could check out your local recycling depot. Ours has a “free stuff” corner where you can pick up all the magazines you could ever want at zero cost. Maybe yours does, too?

3) Find pictures that represent your goals and inspire you

Schedule a couple hours one evening or weekend to go through the magazines and cut out pictures that represent your goals and speak to your heart in some meaningful way.  Fun tip: The last time my staff and I made vision boards at my office, we turned up the radio and had a little musical party going on as we cut out our images, which made it a very vibrant, fun setting to visualize our goals!

When looking for images in the magazines, look for those that immediately make you say, “Yes! That is what I want in my life!” They don’t have to be physical objects or literal interpretations of what you want in your life. Instead, focus on how the images make you FEEL.

For example, if you’d like to move to a home with waterfront property, don’t worry if you can’t find a picture of your perfect “dream home.” Perhaps a picture of an idyllic ocean sunset will be enough to inspire you. Or if you’d like to attract a new romantic partner into your life, instead of hunting for a picture of a man or woman who meets your physical ideal, find a picture that represents love to you – an image of two people holding hands, or even a picture of a heart, for example.

4) Make a collage out of your photos

Once you have collected enough photos, it’s time to make your vision board! Go to your local craft or dollar store and buy a large piece of construction or poster paper. A corkboard or large piece of paper would work as well. Then glue, tack, or tape your pictures to the paper or corkboard in an arrangement that is visually pleasing to you.

5) Add motivational “affirmation words” that represent how you want to FEEL

Your vision of your ideal life shouldn’t be focused on “stuff” so much as on how you want to FEEL. For this reason, I like to add words to my vision board that describe how I want to feel on a daily basis – such as: “joyful,” “abundant,” “powerful,” “fearless,” “loved,” “strong,” “healthy,” “loving,” and “financially free.”

Take some time to create a list of words that describe how YOU want to feel. You can either search for these words in your magazines or write them yourself. Then add them to your vision board in a visually attractive way.

6) Take a few moments to contemplate your vision board every day

To get the full benefit from your vision board, it’s important for you to place it somewhere you can see it every day. I recommend you take a few minutes to look over your vision board at least once or twice a day. I like to review my vision board right before I do a guided visualization, so my goals are top of mind as I train my mind to attract what I truly want into my life. I also like to review it every night before I go to sleep, in order to prompt my sub-conscious mind to come up with new ideas while I’m sleeping on how to achieve my goals. That way, I wake up in the morning bursting with motivation to succeed – and am far more likely to notice and act on opportunities that will bring me closer to my goals.

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My team and I created a complete FREE vision board checklist that allows you to take your current vision board and multiply its effectiveness.  Complete with inspirational words, affirmations, motivational quotes, and assorted blank templates that allow you to add your own personal messages to your vision board.

Remember, By adding a visualization practice to your daily routine, you will naturally become more motivated to reach your goals. You’ll start to notice you are unexpectedly doing things that move you closer to your ideal life. Click the button below to get my 21 point checklist!

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